Only a Stone's Throw

Sometimes the people who are supposed to be the most loving, forgiving, and understanding people are the ones who hate, judge, and refuse to admit their own shortcomings and failures. In the Bible, these people where the Pharisees, the pious and religious do-gooders who clung too tightly to the rules and laws of the prophets. They never could understand that the rules were set up as guidelines for a righteous life, not a straight-edge for perfection. I clearly see where they went astray and how they because so tight-assed in the first place and I cannot fault them for doing so, because i am extremely guilty of it myself. I have stood straight and condemned the broken and bleeding; telling them how ugly and filthy they appear before God... unaware of the filth and wretchedness painting my own soul. I have felt righteous and good, vainly. I have wrinkled my nose at the sincerity of confession and later mocked the tears and weeping of a truly repentant heart. I am guilty, guilty. i am not deserving, i am not worthy. And yet i am loved, i am forgiven. Amazing Grace.

I think once i found myself on the receiving end of this phariseedical judgment, it became much easier to step outside of myself and realize what I had been doing all along. Instead of helping people by condemning them, which ironically was my held belief and not at all a theme in scripture when it came to Jesus, I needed to love them where they were, keep my mouth shut and extend my hand, or my arms.. whichever the situation called for. Wow, what a concept, really. What a lost art, what an extremely difficult task. It is so much easier to spout off religiosity than to actually love.

Aside from the story of the Cross; the most poignant depiction of love, of Amazing Grace, to me, is found in John 8: 3-11. This section of scripture is well known and quoted often, but i am constantly returning to it knowing that i have walked in the shoes of both characters; the Pharisees, and the woman. And i believe that Jesus' final words to the women where not spoken only to her, but to the Pharisees as well, if they would only listen. The words are a promise "Neither do I condemn you", and a pleading "From now on, sin no more".

I'm stepping down from my soapbox now, and i'll end this entry with a poem inspired by this passage and taken from the woman's point of view.

throw that rock to the ground
for you are no better
your words may be slathered in spirituality
but if you throw that at me-
your heart has not felt the change.
your eyes tell the deeper truth
that you, too, have stood in my shoes.
you are afraid to face me because i represent
what lives within you
i have failed you, but you will fail yourself
if you don't take a closer look.
i hurt as much as you-we are the same
broken-both deserving the same stone
but HE refuses to throw it
HE will not condemn us, only love.
now will you see?


help me to love, even when it is easier to condemn.